Total Medals Earned: 437 (From 96 different games.) Total Medal Score: 7,610 Points
Medals Earned: 1/3 (5/155 points)
deliver 1 mail
Deliver all mail
Deliver to every house
Medals Earned: 1/7 (10/110 points)
Achieve 1m points in a single run.
Get 100k points in a single high jump.
Go fast enough to lose your headphones to the wind.
Achieve a 50x multi.
Achieve 100x multi.
Achieve 50m points in a single run.
Get 1m points in a single high jump.
Medals Earned: 5/14 (25/290 points)
Cut Off a Conversation
A Nice Center Smash
Ten Crush-Hugs
Five Love Taps
Far Right Smoosh
You Obey the Rule of Three for Big Yucks!
Far Left Hit
Fifteen Gory Love Lunges
20 Hits in Survival
Perfect Score in Story Mode
21 Spikey Embraces
30 Hits in Survival
40 Hits in Survival
50 Hits in Survival
Medals Earned: 3/12 (20/250 points)
You made it through the morning shift!
You've learned the fine art of the rebound. Or just got lucky.
You got your first 6 point hit! We're so proud!
You're over the hump!
You made it! Now time for be-ew-ti-ful dreams.
You've survived through 5 mascots. OK.
You're getting up there!
You survived 20 psychotic mascots! You're a spiking GOD.
You got mad points with little to work with!
You completed employment mode with 100% security!
You smashed 50 guys in one game sitting! That's a lot!
Perfect in the monster challenge
Medals Earned: 10/18 (80/160 points)
Complete 20 successful hacks
Remember to wash your hands
Obtain 100 items from vending machines
Pick 20 locks
Break 30 Necks
Kill 50 Guards
"forget" to wash your hands
Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!
Detonate 30 C4
Detonate 10 landmines
Take 10,000 footsteps
Have enough time left to get a soda in The Getaway
Medals Earned: 5/14 (50/400 points)
Beat the shit outa the A.T.P. agent with your axe.
Rip the first dude's head off.
Perform The Beast's signature smiley fatality.
Beat the shit outa your axe with the A.T.P. agent.
Shotgun rape the first guy.
Medals Earned: 3/16 (25/455 points)
Choose to play this amazing game of ours that makes you feel better about the world you live in.
Discover the hidden thoughts of The Fonz.
Lose Wilson too early.
Find a spare set of arms
Get your hands on the funniest dinosaur joke you've heard in ages.
Prove you're a genius by figuring out how to capture the crab.
Get a hug from the ghost... and die in the process.
Solve all of Sunburned Bob's problems.
Catch some poop before it lands on the ocean floor.
Save the day with the power of a delicious snowcone.
Talk to at least 25 different things in the game.
Beat the entire game.
Medals Earned: 1/16 (10/495 points)
Get Johnny's cafe order from the movie.
Make a nasty sandwich.
Best your friend.
Read EVERYTHING.
Record EVERYTHING (and listen).
Smash EVERYTHING.
It's a bitch.
Push the hardest.
Make it rain!
Win the race.
Find it.
Take down Chris R in three rounds.
Make a perfect pass every time.
Catch the ball every time.
Activate it.
See everything you shouldn't see.
Medals Earned: 3/11 (20/140 points)
Medals Earned: 5/9 (60/170 points)
End a level with a full supply of acorns
Complete Story Mode
Survive for at least 100 meters in Distance Mode
Complete Story Mode on Hardcore difficulty
Smash three obstacles before touching the ground
Complete Story Mode without dying
Collect the golden acorn in each level of a Story Mode playthrough (retries accepted)
Survive for at least 250 meters in Distance Mode